Why I No Longer Write, Yet I Need To Write

My first love was the visual arts. Ever since I could recall, I was drawing on anything and with anything I could find, which was usually a pencil and scraps of paper, provided by our scarce life in Korea. Much has changed since then; adapting to the American life... I no longer even doodle these days, overtaken by my interest in music.

As a teeanger in a small town, Midwest, I couldn't get enough of what we called "alternative" or "college" music. With the age of Internet yet to fully integrate into our life and chance to see any act live equaling to nil, making music videos, shooting concerts, and writing about my favorite artists were dreams that dissipated with the fold back of my eyelids in the morning. 

For the last 5 years and 9 months, I've been living out my childhood fantasy of capturing some of my favorite musicians through the lens and combination of keys. I built up my resume and portfolio thinking I want to work in the music industry. After reaching the zenith of my "music journalist career" last year, the chasms started to seep in; with the rise and fall of music blogs and the ever-expanding competition in the market, I just didn't get excited about the whole thing anymore. The countless music sites were pretty much posting the same news and very few quality work filtered through that were worth the time out of this hectic modern life. Recognizing my limits, I didn't want to add to the ever-expanding noise if I had nothing original to say. That's why I no longer write music bogs.

After ceasing on news posts this year, I went back to just shooting concerts. And every once in awhile, I'll write out of an innate urge. And I'm pretty certain, no other show of 2015 could affect as much as Sufjan Stevens' profound performance earlier this month. Unable to package it internally, my fingers translated the signals streaming out of my babbling mind, while experiencing sort of a sub-dream virtual reality into the artist's time capsule. My words doesn't do justice but perhaps I also wrote to offset my shortcoming in the photographic dept. (some technical issues) that was the only glitch in otherwise the most perfect Monday. Thus, why I felt the need to write.

Review and pics at The 405.


Sufjan Stevens at Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, Portland (08 June 2015)